I'd Like to Thank the Academy

And all of my friends and family who helped me get where I am today. For those of you who haven't heard, I've finally been recognized as the true charmer that I have always been. Thanks, LT, for the Proximity Award!

Just because you have never heard of it does not mean that it is not important. I'll agree with most of what it says, although I AM always interested in prizes, if you ever want to send one to me.

I am also supposed to award this fantastical honor to some other worthy writers, so drumroll please...

Congratulations to

Alison, Amy and Claire (whenever she gets around to blogging, it's always worth reading)

Blog on, fellow bloggers. Blog on.

It's not over until Strange Brew says it's over

SB is doing much better, thanks to all who have been asking. Apparently the doctor was right; it was just another case of bronchiolitis, not the bird flu, as I was so sure that it was.


But on to a much more exciting topic.


In case you are behind on this issue, you can elevate your mind by clicking on the link below and updating your brain about the ongoing fued between our local coffee shop (Strange Brew) and their next door neighbor (McDonalds).


http://emilyredwood.blogspot.com/2008/11/war-of-words.html


And just when we thought it was all over, McDonalds stepped over the line, reminding customers that they were still offering delicious coffee. No need to go next door for a $4.00 cup of joe. Drive through McDonalds and get one for much less. And it's so tasty too!

But Strange Brew couldn't resist reminding customers what they were really getting with a McD's coffee.

It's really much funnier when you drive by and see the signs side-by-side. McD's on top, and the Brew right below.

Special thanks to Amy, who was kind enough to bring this to my attention. Thankfully, a group of friends and I were all having dinner just across the street from this fiasco last night, and as our husbands were doing such a great job of babysitting, we decided dinner wasn't quite long enough and we needed to get coffee afterward.

As promised, I bought a vanilla latte from Strange Brew so I could compare it to the one I got at McDonalds during their free latte giveaway. It was good, and I really can't say at this point which was better. I feel the only way to get a fair comparison is to get one from each place at the same time, then do a comparison. Perhaps a double blind experiment would be best, to keep any biased feelings from clouding my journalistic judgment.

Amy, are you up for it? I think at least two of us should do it, to provide better results. Plus, I need someone to help me drink each cup while blindfolded.

Bird Flu?

I hope his dinner was the only thing Mr. Sparrow left in our house this week. SB is sick, hopefully not with bird flu.

SB got sick yesterday with a fever and chest wheezing. She also has a nasty cough that sounds like a seal barking. After a LONG night, during which none of us slept, SB and I saw the doctor today, accompanied by my mother.

Same diagnosis as last time. SB has bronchiolitis. It was traumatic enough having the nurses jam sticks up her nose, and heaven forbid anyone else try to listen to her chest with a stethoscope. After the usual torture was finished, the doc announced that there was one more little thing. She ordered chest x rays to be done to make sure SB doesn't have pneumonia.

Have you ever had to watch a child get x rays? If so, then you know how awful it is. Now imagine having to hold your own child down while she kicks and screams FOUR TIMES so they can get a good picture. I understand it needed to be done. What I don't understand is how unsympathetic the technicians were towards us.

They wanted her to stand on a chair, pressed against a machine, while my mom and I stood on either side of her, pinning her arms up above her head, holding her arms, legs and head perfectly still.

First of all, SB wanted nothing to do with that chair or any part of the machine to which we were pinning her. No time to comfort her or try to acquaint her with her surroundings. The techs just pushed her back against the machine with a deadly force, while slamming her head back into the contraption, insisting that we hold her tighter. They took one picture, then disappeared from the room for several minutes without saying one word to us as far as where they were going or whether or not we were done.

We just stood there, bamboozled for several minutes until they stormed back in, pinned her up against the machine again and commanded us to hold her still while she kicked and screamed in protest.

Another picture, another silent exit by the techs, and repeat.

Apparently they could not get a clear picture because SB was not interested in posing for their photo op. Finally, on round four, one of the techs strapped on an apron and helped me hold her down. I found it interesting that she strapped on a protective apron for one pic after my mother and I had been exposed to three rounds of radiation with no protection whatsoever.

But I'm no x ray technician, so who am I to question them? I also wanted to inform them, "She is a child, not a football. Can we be a little more gentle, please?" But I didn't. The fourth time was our lucky winner, so the tech announced, "ok that's all," and walked out. We showed ourselves out.

I bet those ladies don't have kids. The way they treated my poor, sick little baby was just disgraceful. SB is still shaken up from the day's events, and her fever is back. I didn't think she was even going to go down for her nap this afternoon, even though she was clearly exhausted. It took three rocking chair sessions, then ten minutes of crying it out before she finally gave in.

Missing Bunny might have had something to do with that though. SB must have puked or pooped something on him last night, as I discovered some kind of brownish yellow material on him and her crib sheets today. He's being laundered while she sleeps, and I think I'm going to catch a little nap myself. SB wasn't the only one traumatized today!!

Bird Flew

It's a bird! And it's in my house!

*No animals were injured during the course of this story.*

Two days ago, SB was begging to go outside, as usual. I think that kid would live outside if we would let her. Anyway, I picked her up and opened the door, but no sooner had I taken one step outside than something zoomed past my head and into the house. A tiny little sparrow. Cute, but not an invited guest.

It landed on an artificial tree standing in the corner by the window, then flew all around the kitchen, living and dining rooms as we chased it to and fro, Jack with his hat and me wielding the broom. Sarah Beth was enchanted by the entire ordeal, and squealed with delight every time the bird careened past her little head.

We finally shooed him out, and I inspected the house for droppings. Thankfully, he came in on an empty stomach. I was still disgusted by the entire ordeal and happy it was over.

SCENE TWO: 24 hours later

Enter Sarah Beth, knocking on the door, begging to go outside again, calling out for Daddy, who had just left to run an errand. I scooped her up and stepped into the doorway, and a heavy sense of deja vu swept over me as I heard a curious rustling behind me.

The same swooshing noise as before, and a bit of wind rushing through my hair. The bird was back, and this time, he was flying on a full stomach. I quickly strapped SB into her high chair so

A. she wouldn't run outside and
B. I wouldn't trample her while chasing Mr. Sparrow.

I couldn't see him, but I had a pretty good idea of where he was hiding. I grabbed the broom and dove into the fake ficus. The experience must have been too much for him, as he let loose his fury on my dining room floor. I finally chased him out, then dealt with the mess on my floor.

So disgusting.

Jack is the one who figured out that Mr. Sparrow had been nesting in my front door Christmas wreath. Needless to say, it came down the next day. After I beat on the door a few times to scare him away, of course.

Murphy Family Gift Swap

For those of you who did not get one of Jack's special Christmas cards, this is what Jack put into my dad's family dirty santa game. It was certainly a hit, and for those of you who know my Aunt Dee, you can hear her cracking up at :15, :30 and :45.

Oh Holy Night

For me, it just isn't Christmas until I hear Mary Beth sing this song. She thrilled the crowd at my dad's family Christmas last weekend with this family favorite. I am still amazed at her voice.
If you don't have time to listen all the way through, just skip to 1:50. You'll get the point.

Sorry it's kinda dark.

My Bunny's Back

BUNNY UPDATE:

The Prodigal Bunny has returned home! After a nightmare of frantic searching, Jack had the brilliant idea to check behind the couch, which is pushed up against the wall. For sport, SB used to throw things behind it, but I haven't noticed her doing that in a while.

Anyway, she apparently hasn't forgotten about that hiding spot. It took all of my strength to drag our couch away from the wall so that I could get behind it, but it was totally worth it. There was a treasure trove of valuables hidden behind it, including our remote control, some really old Hershey's kisses, a few of my vaccine studies that I had been missing, and sitting pretty on top of everything was BUNNY!!!

SB can finally sleep now. And so can we.

Lost Bunny

REWARD OFFERED
For the safe return of Bunny.

Please help us find Bunny!

Description: He is a soft, stuffed rabbit, white with pastel spots.

Identifying marks: "My First Easter" embroidered on his chest in pink thread.

Answers to the name of Bunny.

Sarah Beth gets very screamy without him at bedtime. In fact, she is screaming right now. I knew we were in trouble when seven o'clock rolled around, and I couldn't find him. Optimistically, I put Surrogate Bunny in her crib instead (which I think is more like Piglet from Winnie the Pooh, but he has ears like bunny, and that is what Sarah Beth loves the most). After the regular night time routine: bathtime, diaper and pajamas, saying good night to Daddy, then to the rocking chair, I put her into her crib and waited for her to roll over, grab Surrogate Bunny's ear and stick it in her mouth with her thumb. Instead, she rolled over, reached for Bunny, then recoiled at the sight of SuBu (Surrogate Bunny).

I tiptoed out the door anyway, hoping for the best. Notsomuch. The quiet crying soon became all out wailing, gut wrenching sobs for Bunny.

Jack and I have torn the house apart. I searched all of her favorite hot spots: the tupperware cabinet, the toilet, and I even dug through the trash can, all to no avail. I went into her room to try to calm her while I racked my brain trying to remember the last place I saw Bunny. When the screaming became unbearable, I returned to the kitchen. Jack met me there.

Emily: We have got to find Bunny.
Jack: Did you check the trash can?

I told you it was her favorite spot. In fact, I had minutes before scolded her for digging an oil-soaked paper towel out of the trash can and cleaning my kitchen floors with it. But Bunny was not there.

Jack is currently taking his turn trying to console our sleepy child who cannot seem to get to sleep without Bunny. So, please, keep your eyes open. SB is offering a $.27 reward for his safe return, and at this point, I'd probably give my right arm to have him back.